Fictional Fighting at its Finest

James Bond vs. Jason Bourne vs. Ethan Hunt

Tags: , , ,

Ground rules: Each combatant works alone, no MI6 or IMF lending a hand. Q is out too, no gadgets allowed. The fight is broken down into three rounds: 1st. A car chase; 2nd. Fisticuffs; 3rd. A shootout.

Personal bias: I’ve watched James Bond movies my whole life and, for my money, Mission Impossible and the Bourne films fall short of Casino Royale. The Bourne Supermacy and Ultimatum are both close seconds. The third Mission Impossible kinda sucked.

Round 1: Bond will opt for a European sports car no doubt, Bourne will pick something more rugged, and Hunt will get a motorcycle…bad choice. The bike won’t handle the first collision, leaving the two more experienced drivers. Bond will out maneuver Bourne on every turn, but Bourne can take the punishment and trick Bond into a vulnerable angle T-boning his vehicle. Bond manages to drift away from sure defeat due in part to his uncanny luck and unwillingness to lose. He would challenge Bourne to a daredevil chase up a mountain in which he would dive out of the car before launching it into a blind curve and over the cliff. Bourne follows to certain defeat/death.

Round 2: Each of the fighters have exhibited superhuman endurance and resistance to harm. The fight at the end of MI:2 is a testament to the amount of hurt Hunt can take and still win. Bond is brute force to Hunt’s acrobatics. However, Bourne is all skill. Unlike the others, he is a government Super Soldier. Bourne would likely be on the defensive until a clear victor emerged between the street fight of Hunt and Bond. The victor would probably be Hunt, but still no match for Bourne.

Round 3: The fighters all begin with a modern handgun in an area with plenty of cover and at a suffiecent distance from each other. They are all both hunters and prey. The fact that Bourne managed to get close enough to take out a sniper with a shotgun in the Bourne Identity says something. He kills Hunt right away. Bond has been in this position before in The Man with the Golden Gun. He knows how to be silent and is as good of a shot of Bourne. But Bourne’s battles are often with fellow super soliders from Operation Treadstone, much better training then the spys at SPECTRE. A double O is still only human compared to the heightened reflexes of Bourne. There would be a long quiet to get into position, but it would end with both opponents spoting each other at the same time a one shot from Jason Bourne’s gun. The quickest draw effect.

Results: Bond 1, Bourne 2, Hunt 0. True, the three round format is flawed. In reality, any one of these rounds would result in two kills, but in reality these people don’t exist. It is most likely that the winner of this bloody exchange would be Jason Bourne.

As per usual, feel free to digress in the comments. Everyone is entitled to their opinions.

  • Daniel Montgomery

    One thing to consider: Bond is more witty and a planner than Bourne. It’s kind of the old Batman vs. Superman deal, where obviously Superman would win if you simply put the 2 in a cage match, however Batman, like bond, is the superior strategist, and would never allow himself to be in the position of hand-to-hand combat with a power like superman. So Bond would know the abilities of his foe- Bourne, and unless forced, would avoid a closed-in situation of hand-to-hand or gun-to-gun combat. If you released the two in seperate parts of the world with orders to kill the other, Bond would emerge victorious as the superior strategist. As to the result of Batman vs. Superman under the same circumstances: This page was your idea and I won’t steal the battle between your 2 all-time favorite characters.

  • HellsColdDay

    Bond and Bourne are both extremely fast thinkers and plan in the moment. I wouldn’t say one is better than the other that way. As far as planning in to the future, the IMF is the best at that. However, that is more Mr. Phelps than Mr. Hunt.

    And I never liked that Superman/Batman debate. Batman would need a lot more than time to plan to beat Superman. He would need time to plan, the element of surprise, homecourt advantage, (I’ll write posts on each of these) and a warehouse of kryptonite.

  • Daniel Montgomery

    I’d just add that batman would have a reasonable chance of killing Superman with a few good Kryptonite weapons, and playing on Supermans real weakness: his protection of humanity. I think Batman, as clever as he is, could set a trap for Superman by setting up a group of people in supposed peril, and lure him into a Kryptonite heavy zone. I’m tempted to finish the story but again I’ll leave it to you.

  • HellsColdDay

    I just wrote an “Element of Surprise” post that talks a little about a Superman/Batman fight.

    If Batman trys to exploit Superman’s soft spot for humanity, that goes against Batman’s character. He is just as commited to not killing as Superman. However, I do get your point. In a comic book battle Batman’s “Hush” storyline, Batman snaps Superman out of Poison Ivey’s control by having Catman throw Lois off a building. If for some reason Superman didn’t come to her aid, Catwoman was still in position to save her herself. Of course, Superman did come to her aid.

  • Wilson

    Are you kidding? Firstly, Bond would have definatly won the Shoot out because of his amazing sense of anyone anywhere, he would have known where Bourne and Hunt is. Lets not forget that James Bond has also faced some super human foes like Jaws. I believe the other two rounds are unarguably right. Bond has amazing skills with a car and Bourne is awsome at fist fighting.

  • Mark 62

    Guys! You can’t bring the historical bond movies b4 casino royle here! From all the bond movies last 2 bond movies have shown bonds real skills(because invisible car don’t exists!) now bettle between three ultimate spys bourn desarves to be the number 1.(because he is the scary verson!):-)

  • SON

    Bourne is number one, he can perfetcly act under pressure

  • Earlofthercs

    Why can’t we bring in historical Bond movies? Where does it say that in the set up?

    Anyways, while I agree with everything until round 3… and even then while I agree that bourne would out quick draw bond, I dont think he’d do it quick enough to stop Bond getting his shot off (he’d have to outdraw fast enough for his bullet to hit bond before bond fires, while that would depend upon how far away they are from one another, in the senario above, I don’t see it happening) in which case Bond would get shot first… but Bourne’d still be shot too! Given that he’d likely take longer to die too, I guess you’d still call it a win for Bourne, but really the true winner would be organised crime and enemy spy agencies, who’d have a field day ocne their 3 greatest opponants have killed each other!

  • JULIOG626

    I Just thought i would school all of you real quick. My man Flint would take them all out with one judo chop. Lol.

  • Earlofthercs

    Nicely played, juliog626. You win one internets.

  • danny martin :P

    bourne will win but u no what will be more of a match to bourne? NEO!

  • danny martin :P

    bourne will win but u no what will be more of a match to bourne? NEO!

  • Jason Bourne


  • Chad

    I agree with everything except for the round one description. The way you described it you made it sound like Bourne was a retard who can't drive. In my personal opinion if Bond just threw his car away and jumped out of his vehicle Bourne would have thought ahead of the possibility of running out of road, and stopped in time to save his vehicle leaving Bond without a vehicle.

    Everything else was dead on.
    Hunt's about as useful as Taekwondo in a real life fight. Great to look at and useful against an untrained opponent, but not for a real combat fighter. And without his toys, Bond is pretty useless as he has no stealth training but seems to be pretty efficient at survival and blowing things up.

    Bourne is the obvious choice for me.

  • Chad

    more witty? Maybe in a sarcastic kinda way. Bourne thinks fast enough on his feet that he calls a meeting half an hour before his train arives at the platform and guides an untrained civilian through the station avoiding all cameras. What has Bond done to compare with that?

  • Grundy

    Tom Cruise is great to look at…

  • Dylan

    Adding on to that: If you watch the Bond movies (I’ve watched almost every single one, and the old Bonds suck. I’m serious, they have no training), he always takes out the stupid henchman guys (with NO talent, because they don’t need it if all they do all the time is guard a useless warehouse or something) first, but then the bad guy gets away. And, he always gets tricked by women, and there’s always 2. One good, one bad. Sometimes both. Then gets into a climatic battle with the bad guy and finally kills him in the weirdest ways. He destroys EVERYTHING. As said before, NO STEALTH TRAINING. That guy at the beginning of ‘From Russia With Love’ had more stealth capabilities than him. As Chonclan (no idea how you spell his name) from Bourne would’ve said: “Jesus, what’s the French word for STEAKOUT!”.

  • Dylan

    He jumps in without looking carefully. The only way he has survived is because the guys he fights against are dumb brutes. Also, Bond always taunts his opponent, further enraging them (increasing dumb brute-ishness) so they attack him, then he tricks them somehow and he wins. He also in turn always gets tricked, and then explains to the bad guy what they already know, and DID to trick him. YAWN. Bourne would be WAY to smart for that. And, pointing back to the fact that Bond fights with brute strength, this is because he’s always been surrounded by brute strength guys. Bourne wouldn’t be drawn into his games, and would totally whoop his ass. Ethan Hunt is a drama queen, and very easily pissed off. Part of this might come from the fact that his agency seemingly turns on him in every movie.

  • Dylan

    Also, if Bond jumped out… on a mountain… wouldn’t he fall to his death?

  • Dave

    Maybe Jason Bourne would win, but the Bourne movies are kinda boring. James Bond is clearly the funnest to watch.

  • Mo66

    You Yanks know fuck all lol! Stick to your cheeseburgers, incest and Jerry Springer.

  • Akawill0199

    I agree with the fact that in the first round you kinda made Hunt sound retarded bringing a bike to a car fight…I think his selection would have been somewhere between class and rugged…Also in the hand to hand battle as advanced as Bourne is, he still has the same anatomical weak points as every other human and seeing as Hunt is more of an opportunitistic fighter he would most likely wait for the right moment to strike more like when bond and bourne has beaten the crap out of each other a battle in which before watcing skyfall I would have said bourne would have won easily but this new bond is more of a ground and pound type however youth and illions of dollars and yes I said illions because they spent an ass load of money on his training would put bourne on top. Now the shooting round complete different story Bourne would win that hands down

  • cadenwamsley

    You don’t give Ethan th credit he deserves he’s pretty boss. He could stand against bourne in the shoot off but he also would not pick a motorcycle. He could give bourne a little trouble in hand to hand.